Show a little love… the invisibility of mental illness.

​When I was growing up, our family had one major mantra instilled in us by our mother: "Peace and Love!" Whether my brother and I were bickering or we were struggling with teenage drama, this was what we were always told…
 
I thought about this when I recently read a New York Times article about Dr. Marsha Linehan, a woman who changed the course of psychological treatment for people suffering from some of the most treatment-resistant and severe mental health symptoms (see link below). She received her doctorate in Clinical Psychology in 1971, and since this time she has grown to become a pillar in the field of psychological research and treatment. She has dedicated her career to working with clients with the most severe emotional symptoms, those clients whom many clinicians feel helpless in trying to reduce their emotional pain and turmoil.

40 years later, a stunning discovery: Not only is she a renowned clinical psychologist, but she also suffered from a severe mental illness.
 
As the article explains, until June of 2011, it went unknown that Dr. Linehan suffered from severe mental illness as a youth and young adult. Depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, psychosis, cutting, burning, suicidal gestures, and hospitalizations were all a part of her emotional picture. Back then, the thought of her becoming a leader in psychological treatment would have been unfathomable. Today, she is a woman who you would never expect suffered with such extreme mental health symptoms.

Although this is an extreme example of how mental illness or mental health symptoms can afflict even the most unthought of people around us, the message shines through: Mental illness—or even just isolated mental health symptoms such as depression, anxiety, panic attacks, chronic pain, eating disorders, self-harm, or substance abuse or addiction—is often hidden. But the reality is, mental health struggles spans across all cultures. Throughout time, men and women of all races, sexualities, ages, and nationalities, including the rich and poor, young and old, educated or not have struggled with emotional pain. Mental illness doesn’t discriminate.
 
There are people around you who are likely suffering inside and you have no idea. Maybe it is your hairdresser, waitress, colleague, or even one of your closest friends or a family member… and maybe if you knew of their pain, you would take the few extra seconds (because that's all that it takes!) to be a little bit kinder, a little more patient, or a little less judgmental, because we never know what someone is going through on the inside. And, isn't that what we would want from those around us if we were hurting? Quid pro quo: You get what you give.
 
In his 2011 book, Flourish, Dr. Martin Seligman points to the value of kindness towards others. His research in Positive Psychology shows that helping others increases our own self-esteem, decreases depression, and enhances our overall satisfaction in life.  So, next time you meet someone new, are frustrated with a co-worker, or are with your family, let’s try to show a little more love and EMPATHY for those around you. You never know where mental illness or mental health symptoms are weighing on someone’s heart, thoughts, or behaviors, and nothing heals like compassion.
 
Imagine how much more gentle and enjoyable this world would be if we all just showed a little more peace and love… Pay it forward!


 
All the best,
 
 
Dr. Sarah Ray